The Strengths Companion: A is for recognising that people buy Application and Achievement

Imagine that you are offering ideas, models or knowledge that help to raise people’s awareness about a particular topic. This may well work for a certain time and pay the rent. But then the work can run out. Why is this the case?

People want to continue increasing their awareness. But, after a while, they realise there are only so many ‘eternal truths’. The key is to apply these principles successfully.

Certainly if you are a genius it may be possible to keep providing breakthroughs. Most suppliers, however, are judged by how the awareness can be applied in action and deliver achievement. Let’s explore these three steps.

Awareness

Imagine that you love to provide knowledge that helps people to expand their awareness about a particular topic. This might be in an area such as education, health, teamwork, technology, sales, business, environmental improvement or whatever.

You will constantly explore the area to gather information. This may lead to developing models, tools and ideas that you can share with other people. Passing on this knowledge can help to increase their awareness about a particular topic.

Try tacking the exercise on this theme. This invites you to do two things.

Describe the specific theme in which you like to pass on knowledge and, if appropriate, help people to expand their awareness.

If possible, write this in ‘How to …’ terms. For example: How to take charge of their careers … How to build great terms … How to increase sales … How to build eco-friendly sustainable houses … How to pass exams … or whatever.

Describe the specific things you can do to continue to learn, develop and pass on more knowledge to people about this topic.

For example, you may wish to run seminars, do coaching, write articles, build successful prototypes, develop your web site, make videos or whatever.

Application

“For many years I was one of the few people spreading knowledge in a particular field,” said one person.

“This led to many invitations to do presentations and share the ideas with customers. But then the work began to dry up.

“People went onto the internet to gather knowledge. There were also many suppliers offering services in my specialist area. One potential customer said:

‘The services that people offer seem to come back to the same principles. Words are easy and anybody can call themselves an expert.

‘Being a pragmatist, I want suppliers who can translate the ideas into practice and deliver positive results.’

“Bearing this in mind, I became more hands-on. I decided:

To do in-depth project work with three of my favourite customers.

To agree on the specific goals and get a clear mandate.

To apply the knowledge and perform superb work.

“This helped to build credibility – both with these customers and with other potential clients.”

Bearing in mind your area of expertise, try tackling the exercise on this theme.

Describe the specific things you can do to help people to move from awareness to application.

Achievement

“The teams I was working with achieved their goals and produced success stories,” said the person. “These results provided currency that paved the way to future opportunities.”

People buy success; they don’t buy the theory of success. So it is good to build a track record of achievement. This can lay the foundations for future work.

One other point is worth remembering when aiming to get business. Imagine a scenario where two potential suppliers have been invited to present to a potential client.

Supplier A starts by saying what they aim to achieve in terms of delivering success to the client.

Supplier B starts by spending a lot of time explaining their philosophy and how they will raise people’s awareness about the particular topic.

Which approach is likely to grab the potential customer’s attention?

People want results. So the first step is to do your homework and, as far as possible, clarify the customer’s picture of success.

Building in the vital elements of customisation, it can then be useful to describe what can be delivered in terms of:

* The potential achievements.

* The potential methods of application.

* The potential methods of expanding people’s awareness.

Bearing in mind your area of expertise, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to do two things.

Describe the specific things you can do to help people to move from application to achievement.

Describe the specific things you can do to explain the specific results your services can deliver to potential clients in terms of achievements.

There are many approaches to doing fine work. One approach is to share knowledge that increases people’s awareness.

Many buyers now want something more. They want suppliers who apply the knowledge and help them to achieve success. The suppliers who make this happen are more likely to attract buyers for their products and services.

3 tips for choosing a mentor

Imagine you are looking for a mentor. Good mentors are wise and trusted advisers. They pass-on knowledge in a way that helps the mentee to achieve their personal or professional goals.

Mentors are now used by many people in organisations. Why? Despite being successful, individuals sometimes like to take time-out to reflect, get an overview of their situation and make good quality decisions. They also like to draw on the mentor’s knowledge so they can be even more effective in their work.

Mentoring plays a key role in organisations that wish to nurture talent. So let’s explore how you might choose a good mentor.

1) You can clarify the qualities you want in a mentor.

Choose somebody who has similar values. Look for a mentor who expresses the values you believe in – and seems able to do so successfully at a high level. When working with young people in the 1960s, for example, I sought out several ‘grandees’ who ran famous therapeutic communities.

Travelling to sit at their feet, listen and learn provided remarkable insights. Each one had a common characteristic; they wanted me to ‘take the best and leave the rest’. They encouraged me to make my own decisions – they did not want followers. Values-fit is vital.

So what are the qualities you want in a mentor? Different people will, of course, look for different things. One person said:

“Credibility is crucial – they must know their onions. They must be a good listener and respect my views but, at the same time, I don’t want them to pull any punches.

"They need to be somebody who has lived – who has had ups and downs – but still has a positive spirit. It’s great if they can understand the way I think—which is in pictures—and provide practical ideas I can use in working life. Do you know any such perfect people?”

Try tackling the exercise on this theme. Describe the qualities you want in such a person.

My Ideal Mentor

The qualities I want in my ideal mentor are somebody who:

*

*

*

2) You can find a mentor – or mentors – with these qualities.

Some organisations have formal schemes that provide a list of potential mentors. They then invite mentees to choose from this faculty. Several things are worth bearing in mind if this is the case. It is important:

* For the mentee to choose the mentor – rather than have one assigned.

* For the mentee to, if possible, choose a mentor who is ‘outside the line’ – not the mentee’s manager or manager’s manager.

* For the sessions to be confidential and focused on the mentee’s agenda – not acting as another form of management.

What if your organisation does not have a formal mentoring programme? Start by clearing it with your manager and HR department that it will be okay to have a mentor. They will normally be supportive.

You can then do what many people have done before – approach somebody to ask if they would be your mentor. Surprisingly, this often works. (You can have different mentors for different topics – for example, a technical mentor and a career mentor.) If you decide to approach a potential mentor – inside or outside an organisation – take the following steps.

First, do your research thoroughly. Get to know about the person, their values and how they are regarded. Do this by asking around – blind dates seldom work.

Second, clarify what you do and don’t want from the mentor.

Finally, clarify how to approach the person.

You will need to position the mentoring in a way that works for them. They are probably busy people – so you must do all the leg-work and fit in with their diary.

3) You can make clear contracts with the mentor about what you would like to cover in the mentoring sessions.

Start by having an informal meeting with the potential mentor. Explain the topics you want to cover during the mentoring sessions.

For example: how to manage difficult customer situations, how to take the next step in your career, how to manage your life-work balance. You will obviously discuss these topics with your manager – but would also like an outside view.

Explain how often you would like to meet and how you will prepare for the sessions. You may want to start, for example, by having 3 sessions – then reviewing the contract. If the chemistry works – and both parties agree – set a date for the first formal meeting.

Good mentoring is often based on clear contracting. So try tackling the following exercise. This invites you to do three things.

First, describe what you want from the mentoring relationship.

Second, describe what you see as your responsibilities in working to achieve these goals.

Third, describe the specific help you want from the mentor.

Share these ideas with them and make clear working contracts. Then enjoy the sessions. Try completing the following sentences.

The Strengths Companion: C is for Choices and Consequences

Each of us makes choices every day. Each choice does, of course, have consequences.

Good decision-making often calls for clarifying the choices, clarifying the consequences and choosing the way forward. We can then work had to achieve concrete results. Let’s explore these concepts.

People make choices

People make choices all the time. They can choose, for example, to be positive or negative, to take responsibility or avoid responsibility, to count their blessings or count their burdens.

Viktor Frankl’s book Man’s Search For Meaning showed how, even in the concentration camps, people who focused on hope brought meaning to their days. He wrote:

Man is not free from his conditions, but he is free to take a stand towards his conditions.

Al Siebert’s work on resiliency shows how people choose to behave differently in the face of hardship. Some choose to be creative and find solutions to challenges. Some choose to complain and give up.

People choose their attitude. They can then choose the way they feel, behave, speak, deal with setbacks and encourage other people. This leads to the next stage.

People can recognise that
each choice has consequences

Good decision-makers recognise that, whichever route they choose, there will always be consequences. Even doing nothing has a consequence.

“But you don’t always have choices,” somebody may say. “There are some things you cannot change.”

Peak performers focus on ‘controlling the controllables’. They build on what they can control and manage what they can’t. They do whatever they can to shape their future.

There are many models for decision-making. One approach is to employ the 3Cs: Clarity, Creativity and Concrete Results.

Imagine that you face a challenge. You may start tackling it by working through the following stages.

People can make choices, manage the consequences
and work hard to achieve concrete results

Good decision-makers often make decisions based on the consequences of each option – rather than the options themselves.

Such people can therefore be considered to, in some way, ‘choose the consequences’. They then find ways to build on the pluses and minimise the minuses on the route to achieving success.

Imagine you have outlined the potential options, you will then come to your conclusions. You will aim:

* To choose the route forward.

* To, if necessary, make clear working contracts.

* To translate the ideas into action and deliver concrete results.

So you may consider some going through the following steps.

We always have choices; even if these are limited to choosing our attitude in a given situation. Some people find this liberating; others find it challenging.

People who embrace this approach are more likely to take responsibility and accept the consequences. They can then work hard to achieve their picture of success.

3 tips for playing your own game

“There are some places where I feel at ease and just focus on my own performance,” said one person. “Whilst I aim to co-operate with people, I do not compare myself with them or get involved in some kind of competition. Like a good golfer, artist or musician, I put my energy into fulfilling my potential.”

“On the other hand, there are some places where I worry about where I stand in the ‘pecking order’. This eventually becomes debilitating. Whilst I can learn from others, I want to concentrate on where I ‘play my natural game’, rather than lose sleep over the efforts of others.”

Peak performers often take this route. Whilst some do feel spurred on by competition, they translate this into channelling their talents. They ‘control the controllables’, rather than worry about what they can’t control. Let’s explore how you can follow this path in your own way.

1) You can put yourself in places where you focus on your own game.

Where do you experience this feeling? You may be painting a picture, composing a song, cooking a meal, solving a technical problem, cultivating a garden, making a presentation or whatever. What do you feel like then? What are the principles you are following? How can you follow these more in the future?

Looking at my own life, there have been specific activities where I have focused on the experience, rather than be concerned about comparisons. For example, when mentoring, running workshops and writing.

There have been two others – making ‘pitches’ for business and running football teams – where, whilst supposedly in competition with others, I felt little pressure. The theme in all these activities has been helping others to succeed – whether they are a mentee, reader, client, football team or whatever – rather than ‘beating the competition’.

Certainly it has been good to win the business or the football championship, but these outcomes have been by-products.

On the other hand, there are some areas where I worry about what I can’t control. This does not help anybody. So I try to quickly focus on everything that is controllable. Sometimes it takes a big self-kick to make this transition.

Try tackling the exercise on this theme. First, describe a specific activity where you focus on your own game, rather than worry about that of others. Second, describe how you can put yourself in this place more often. Try completing the following sentences.

2) You can play your own game and keep improving your performance.

Peak performers are committed to Kaizen – the Japanese concept of continuous improvement. There are many tools you can use to keep developing. Here are two suggestions.

* You can learn from your own performance.

Keep an ongoing record called My Development Diary. Looking back on the past week, for example, describe specific things under the following headings.

My Development Diary

The specific things I have done
well in the past week have been:

*

*

*

The specific things I can do even
better in the future – and how – are:

*

*

* You can learn from other people.

Write the names of three people whose opinions you respect. Looking at your professional work, invite them to give honest feedback on:

a) The specific things you do well.

b) The specific things you can do even better in the future.

Also invite them to give suggestions regarding a possible action plan. Whilst you don’t have to take all the ideas on-board, the exercise can provide valuable food for thought.

Try tackling the exercise on this theme. Describe the specific things you can do to concentrate on your own game and keep improving. Try completing the following sentences.

3) You can focus on your own game and become the best you can be.

Another way to develop ‘your own game’ is to find and follow your ‘tradition’.

What does this mean? Your tradition is made up of people whose path you are pursuing in your own way. They may be particular kinds of workers, athletes, artists, musicians, inventors, leaders, philosophers or whatever. Bearing in mind the principles they followed, you can learn lessons from them and integrate these into ‘your own game’.

Try tackling the following exercise on this theme. First, write the names of people whose tradition you may be following. Second, describe some of the principles they pursued. Third, describe how you can use some of these ideas to make full use of your talents.

My Tradition

The names of some of the people
whose tradition I am following are:

*

*

*

The principles they followed were:

*

*

*

The specific things I can do to integrate some of these
ideas into ‘my own game’ and try to fulfil my potential are:

*

*

*

There are many ways to keep improving in life. One approach is to focus on your own game, rather than worrying about that of others. You can then put all your energy into becoming the best kind of person or professional you can be.

Try tackling the exercise on this theme. Describe the specific things you can do to become the best you can be. Try completing the following sentence.

3 tips for being a deviant who delivers

Creativity calls for doing things differently. But organisations have a love-hate relationship with people who are different. So how can you survive – and even thrive – by doing things your own way?

“If you are going to be a deviant, you have to deliver,” is the rule. Otherwise you will live dangerously. Sometimes this is exciting, but failing to deliver the goods will invite strong repercussions.

Great organisations are built on ‘similarity of spirit and diversity of strengths’. They want people who have similar values but a variety of talents. Yet there is also a limit to what ‘differences’ can be allowed within an organisation. It is important to be real, however, and follow your own ‘rules within the rules’.

How to achieve this goal? Be positive, be professional and be a peak performer. Let’s explore these points.

1) You can be positive.

Encourage other people and help them to succeed. Sounds obvious – but some individuals flaunt their ‘individuality’ by dismissing other people’s opinions. “Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down,” said Jimmy Durante.

Today’s equivalent in fast moving organisations is: “Be friendly towards everybody – whatever their role – because one day you may be applying to them for a job.” If you ever find yourself in conflict, try to go for a ‘win-win’.

Being an encourager increases the chances of ‘getting away’ with being different. Being negative makes life an uphill struggle. Try completing the following sentence.

2) You can be professional.

Several years ago I was approached by a brilliant marketer, let’s call him Dave, who had been twice been passed over for promotion. Getting a reality check from his boss, he found his colleagues considered him unprofessional. They said:

“He is great with clients, but rude to colleagues. He promises clients a proposal in 2 days, but doesn’t check whether we can get the data by then.

"During meetings he does email, rather than listen to what people are saying. He shows impatience by interrupting the speaker or going out to make phone calls. He has a brilliant strategic brain, but shows little respect for colleagues in the team.”

He had previously been in denial. Dave now saw that his behaviour was preventing promotion to a more strategic role. Of course, he had options. Dave could:

a) Ignore the feedback.

b) Say everybody else was wrong.

c) Attach himself to bosses who would hire him for his strategic brain, rather than interpersonal skills.

d) Take the messages on board and try to get another result.

Dave opted for the latter option. He aimed to become more professional with both colleagues and clients. The approach we explored together was:

"Imagine you are a freelancer running your own business and supplying services to this company. How would you behave? You would always be on stage. So you would probably behave professionally towards everybody in the business – the receptionist, managing director, PA and potential future clients you met in the corridor."

"People would make judgements about you every moment. You certainly have these skills – because you demonstrate them superbly with clients. The question is: Do you want to take the time to behave professionally towards everybody in the business? If so, how can you do so in the next week, month and year?”

Dave chose to make the effort. For example, if somebody stopped him to ask for a chat as he was rushing to a meeting, he no longer brushed them off. He gave them 100% attention and said: “Be good to catch up. Right now I am on my way to a meeting – but immediately after it has finished I will get back to you with a time when we can meet.” And he did.

Being super-professional gives you a license to be different in other ways. Try completing the following sentence.

3) You can be a peak performer.

Geniuses get away with being ‘odd’—providing they deliver the goods. Some people adopt the ‘genius mannerisms’, but fail to produce great work. Choose a specific ‘project’ that will contribute to the business. Get the sign-off from the key sponsors. Be positive and professional towards your colleagues. Then be super creative.

Providing you do great work, you will maintain your licence to be a deviant who delivers. Try completing the following sentence.